How to Exit – Grand and Brave

One of the friends I’ve made here in Durham is Bonnie, the owner of my favorite chocolate shop/bakery in town. Surprised? Didn’t think so. By “friend” in this case I mean we chat a long time when I drop in and she doesn’t have other customers. She works seven days a week so I’ve never socialized with her outside her shop. She is a single woman who boldly travels the world on her own – we talk about traveling, a lot. I dropped by her shop in May and eventually learned she has recently been diagnosed with stage 4 liver cancer. Conventional chemo not expected to work so she was enrolled in a trial out of Charlotte. Next time I dropped by her shop there was a sign posted that it would be closed until the end of June. This kind of broke my heart because I was thinking of her being hospitalized in Charlotte for some aggressive experimental treatment. Yesterday I drove by and saw my friend on the shop patio watering her plants. So happy to see her back, I stopped. No other customers so I immediately launched into how glad I was to see her back from treatment, how was it, how is she doing, etc. No, she said, she had not been in the hospital, all June SHE HAD BEEN TREKKING IN THE HIMALAYAS – UP TO 15,000 FEET – WITHOUT OXIGEN!!! She said she had been dreaming of doing that since she was a kid and realized she didn’t have much time left. Half her group dropped out from altitude sickness. There had been a death in another group the night before her trek started. She talked about how many times she was in pain – semi blacked out from lack of oxygen and exhaustion – but she said she just could not quit. She said thoughts just dominated that she’d rather die pursuing her goal than abandon it. She showed me her toes, which were still very discolored. She says she feels spiritually changed – the mountain they trekked is sacred to the locals who make annual pilgrimages to the world’s highest temple. It’s not her religion but it reached her. I’m in awe and still processing her story.